An Old Dog is a Dumb Dog

It is genuine truth that you can't teach and old dog new tricks. A human I think you can, but not a dog.

I love my beagle, but she is incredibly stupid. If you didn't already know, we had to put her outside when we figured out Mia's alleriges to her were what made her throw up all the time. Yes, yes - so sad how we had to kick the dog out. But I couldn't very well put Mia out, could I?

Bailey was outside for quite a long time before she figured out she could dig under the fence and escape. I know - beagles are known for their longing to escape and explore, maybe even become lost in the process. So the first, most affordable option was to put her on a 30-foot line to keep her away from the fence. But then the moron would just go around and around the bush, or tree, or porch railing slats, and become grossly entagled. I thought putting a gate up to keep her off the porch would help - it didn't.

After being at a friend's house, I noted his two beagles did just find staying within the confines of an electric fence - there wasn't even a privacy fence like I have. So I thought I would go out and buy one so I could at least get her off the line. Well, she learned to stay away from the fence quickly enough.

But there's this corner of my yard which I intend to landscape this year, maybe hang a hammack, put up a swing set for Mia, etc. I want to lay mulch in the whole area with few if any plants. I don't want the dog over there. So I decided to lay the electric fence to border this area to let her learn early. What does she do? She crosses it routinely. And what's worse, the system has a built in feature that continues to shock her for ten seconds if she crosses the line, stops for ten, the shocks for ten more. It does this a maximum of three times over a minute so as not to fry her brain (you know, from pudding to corn syrup). Yet she does it anyway. Is she a masochist?

To top it off, when I retrieve her from the forbidden area, she wants to run onto the deck, where the wire is actually quite concentrated. As the system starts to shock her, instead of turning around into the safe zone where she should know she won't be shocked, she runs into the corner - right on top of the wire. Even worse, the damn thing beeps as she approaches the boundary to let her know to back off, and she doesn't get it.

Maybe in a few days she will learn. I have my doubts.